What can we do when comrades feel down?
I wouldn’t say there had not been instances when I felt this will was not strong enough. But I’m saying that at many important moments and sometimes in the most unexpected situations, people do rise to the occasion.
Dear Meg,
What can we do when comrades feel down while we’re working on creating the better world we all deserve? I want to help, but I’m not sure how. They’re really caught up in the shortcomings and can’t see any hope in the world.
As someone who shares this path alongside them, the emotional burden of witnessing this struggle and loss of hope is distressing as well.
F
Thank you for looking after our comrades, and for writing to me. I believe you’ve articulated something that’s difficult, but important, for us to talk about.
Losing hope as an activist, I can imagine, could feel very much like sinning. On top of feeling low—as one does with the loss of hope—one would also feel guilt, with thoughts along the lines of, “we’re not supposed to feel this way!”
But like I’ve written many times before, there are no shoulds with feelings. Losing hope does happen, and I would add, even to the best of us. The question, then, isn’t whether it’s alright to feel hopeless as a revolutionary, but what to do about it when we’re in the situation.
We begin with what’s within our control, always. We give ourselves the care we need, most preferably in a community setting. Yes, you might not have much hope right now, but I promise you’ll be fine if you’re there for each other—to listen, to cook and eat, to play music, to explore nature together (the list goes on), until the other feels better.
In any case, losing hope does not, and should not, mean losing commitment. I think this is the case for our comrades. In fact, I would argue that most of the time, it’s not the loss of hope that weighs them down, but the fear that because of it, they might have no use for the movement. That, as you know, is absolutely untrue.
More important than staying hopeful, I believe, is to keep fighting. To acknowledge the feelings’ existence, but to carry out one’s duties anyway. I think it helps a lot to focus on the work at hand. This way, one actually feels allowed to lose hope—what isn’t allowed is to not do what needs to be done. There’s a difference. Moreover, being able to do something still, however small, should bring a sense of accomplishment, and renew one’s strength.
Once you’ve regained some, I would advocate reclaiming hope, as a matter of principle. I think we must continue to look forward to the revolutionary vision of a better world, to believe in its possibility. To nurture this hope is, in a way, to honor the sacrifices of our martyrs: we do not give up because our comrades did not die in vain. Such hope, too, would be an expression of our faith in the oppressed, a supreme trust in their will to stand for their fellow human.
I wouldn’t say there had not been instances when I felt this will was not strong enough. But I’m saying that at many important moments and sometimes in the most unexpected situations, people do rise to the occasion. I think this is how history is made anyway, and why we can have this conversation today.
Fortunately, too, I’ve witnessed enough examples of miracles of life in the movement—people who could have easily taken oft-travelled roads, but became comrades who risked life and limb for the Cause, and with their sacrifices, made the impossible possible. There were dutiful churchworkers, and landlords and businessmen, who ended up becoming revolutionaries in our midst. There used to be timid farmers and workers who are now our most fervent campaigners, our most eloquent and revered freedom-fighters.
From the harsh days of the dictatorship, we also have countless stories of men and women who chose—against all logic of personal safety and instinct of self-preservation – and organize among communities. They showed us that in the most hopeless, pitch-dark situations, a spark can and does emerge, and change everything. Sometimes at once, sometimes over time. Both are alright.
Just yesterday I was talking to a friend who shared their experience of holding a long educational discussion with someone who used to not want to be involved in activism. Someone who once just liked a quiet and safe life. Someone who used to wonder how come activists would come to them even on weekends. Now they wanted to learn so much more about society—they did not want the session to end, and say they have never been more excited about studying.
My friend was overjoyed, and there was this glimmer in their eyes as they talked about it. I know this is not exactly the grand, sweeping triumph you might have wanted me to write about, but I think of how this might be what organizers go through each day, and keep them going: living with the people, understanding their needs, standing with them to fight for those needs. Misperceiving at times, making mistakes, and course-correcting. To try and try again while growing through errors, I think that’s what waging a revolution means.*
These days, we hear news of the State failing the people at every turn, alongside increasingly brazen attacks on activists, on the daily. It’s been injustice upon injustice, and each time, our heart breaks a little. In such instances, I know there is great power in seeing even the tiniest fruits of our efforts. They make the painful parts easier to bear.
In this admittedly tough time in our history, I wish you these moments, enough to keep you going. More importantly, I wish you the strength to stay in the struggle, and to be able continue to fight, and fight beyond hope.
Take care, F, and thank you once again for writing.
Meg
*Please see a previous exchange on what makes a good activist: https://tinyurl.com/mrxzafkv, and the very first question I answered on the page: https://tinyurl.com/2ujrx3zf.
Dear Meg,
Ano ang maaari kong gawin kapag lugmok ang mga kasama habang itinatatag natin ang mas makatarungang lipunan para sa lahat? Gusto kong tumulong, pero hindi ko tiyak kung paano. Nahihirati sila sa mga pagkakamali at pinapanawan ng pag-asa.
Bilang kanilang kasama sa landas na ito, mabigat para sa akin na makita ang kanilang pagdurusa at kawalang pag-asa.
F
Dear F,
Maraming salamat sa pag-aalaga sa ating mga kasama at sa pagliham sa akin. Tingin ko’y tinumbok mo ang isang paksang mahirap, ngunit mahalagang pag-usapan.
Sa mga aktibista, alam kong tila kasalanan ang mawalan ng pag-asa. Kaya naman bukod sa pagkalugmok na dulot nito, dadalhin din natin ang pagkabagabag at iisiping “hindi ko ito dapat nararamdaman.”
Ngunit gaya ng madalas kong sabihin, wala namang “dapat” pagdating sa damdamin. Nangyayari ang pagpanaw ng pag-asa, maging sa mga pinakamahuhusay sa atin. Kaya marahil ang tanong ay hindi kung ayos lang bang maranasan ito ng isang rebolusyonaryo, kundi ano ang dapat gawin kapag nasa gayon tayong kalagayan.
Lagi tayong magsisimula sa mga bagay na nasa ating kamay. Mungkahi kong ibigay natin sa sarili ang kalingang kailangan, lalo na sa konteksto ng komunidad. Sa ganito, katiting man ang pag-asa, bubuti naman ang iyong pakiramdam dahil nariyan kayo para sa isa’t isa. Upang makinig, magluto’t kumain, magpatugtog o umakyat ng bundok (at iba pang aktibidad), hanggang maging ayos ang lagay ng kasama.
Ano’t anuman, hindi nangangahulugan, at hindi dapat, na kasabay ng pagkawala ng pag-asa ang ating paninindigan. Ganito naman madalas para sa ating mga kasama. Sa katunayan, tingin ko’y hindi ang kawalang pag-asa ang kanilang mabigat na pinapasan, kundi ang takot na dahil dito ay hindi na sila makapagsilbi sa kilusan. Gaya ng alam mo, hindi ito totoo.
Para sa akin, mas mahalaga, kaysa sa pag-asa, ang pagpapatuloy sa paglaban. Maaari namang tanggapin ang nararamdaman, ngunit magsikap pa rin na tupdin ang tungkulin. Sa tingin ko’y malaking tulong ang lubos ang pagtuon sa gawain. Sa ganito, madarama nating maaari naman tayong mawalan ng pag-asa. Ang hindi dapat ay ang pabayaan ang mga bagay na dapat tapusin. Gaano man kaliit ang ating gawain, ang pagtupad nito ay maghahatid ng maalwang pakiramdam at nakakapagbigay ng panibagong lakas.
Kapag tayo’y nakapagpanibagong-lakas na, maaari nang muling pukawin ang pag-asa. Dahil sa huli, tingin ko’y tungkulin natin ang magtiwala sa posibilidad ng tinatanaw nating panibagong daigdig. Ang pagtitiwalang ito, sa isang banda, ay pagkilala natin sa sakripisyo ng ating mga martir. Hindi tayo susuko, dahil hindi sila nagbuwis ng buhay para sa wala. Gayundin, ang pag-asa ay pagtitiwala rin sa mga pinagsasamantalahan, sa kanilang kapasyahang tumindig para sa kapwa.
Hindi ko man masasabing kailanman ay ‘di ko naramdamang hindi ganoon katindi ang kapasyahang ito, tingin ko’y sa maraming mahahalagang yugto, at sa mga hindi inaasahang sandali, nagpapasya rin ang mga mamamayan. Sa ganito nalikha at nalilikha ang ating kasaysayan, at kaya rin tayo naririto ngayon.
Mapalad din akong masaksihan ang maraming halimbawa ng himala sa kilusan—mga kasamang madali sanang tumahak na lang ng karaniwang landas, ngunit naging aktibista, at nag-alay ng sarili para sa ating hangarin, at ginawang posible ang imposible. May mga taong-simbahan, mga panginoong maylupa at negosyante na naging rebolusyonaryo at ngayo’y kasama natin. Mayroong mga dati ay tahimik at kiming mga magsasaka at manggagawa na naging mahuhusay at pinagpipitagang mga kampanyador at tagapagsalita.
Mula sa panahon ng diktadura, marami rin tayong kuwento ng mga kasamang pinili—nang labag sa lohika ng pansariling kaligtasan—na mag-organisa sa mga komunidad. Ipinamalas nila sa atin kung paanong sa pinakalunos at madilim na kalagayan, kayang baguhin ng isang mitsa ang lahat.
Kahapon lang ay ikinukuwento sa akin ng isang kaibigan ang karanasan nilang magturo sa isang dati-rati’y ayaw maging bahagi ng mundo ng aktibismo. Noon, nais na lang nila ng tahimik at ligtas na buhay. Nagtataka sila kung bakit hanggang Sabado’t Linggo’y niyayaya sila sa mga pag-aaral. Ngayon, gustong-gusto nilang matuto at bitin pa sa naging talakayan. Sabik silang patuloy na mag-aral ng lipunan at kasaysayan.
Labis ang kasiyahan ng aking kaibigan. Marahil ay hindi ito ang malaking tagumpay na nais mong marinig, ngunit naisip kong ganito siguro ang karanasan ng mga organisador araw-araw, kaya sila nakapagpapatuloy: nakikipamuhay sa komunidad, inaalam ang kanilang mga pangangailangan at tumitindig upang ipaglaban ang mga ito. Paminsa’y nagkakamali ng suri at ng mga pasya, ngunit nagwawasto. Ang paulit-ulit na pagsubok, habang natututo sa mga pagkakamali—tingin ko’y ganito ang ibig sabihin ng pagrerebolusyon.*
Sa kasalukuyan, araw-araw tayong pinupukol ng masasamang balita: ng kung paano palaging binibigo ng pamahalaan ang mga mamamayan at ginigipit ang mga lumalaban. Patong-patong ang kawalang hustisya, na mabigat dalhin para sa atin. Sa gayong mga sandali, alam kong malaking bagay na makita kahit ang pinakamaliliit na bunga ng ating mga pagsisikap. Pinagagaan nila ang sakit.
Sa madilim na yugto na ito ng ating kasaysayan, hiling ko para sa iyo ang gayong mga pagkakataon. Hiling ko, lalo na, ang tatag upang manatili sa ating pakikibaka, upang patuloy lumaban, kahit sa panahong nanghihina ang ating pag-asa.
Maraming salamat, F, at salamat ulit sa pagliham.
Meg
P.S. Maaari mo ring balikan mga aking naisulat sa paksang “Paano ba maging mabuting aktibista?” at ang unang-unang tanong na aking sinagot sa aking pahina.